The College Admissions Scoop: Selective Schools Grasp at Reasons to Deny

By Marilyn G.S. Emerson, M.S.W., CEP

Every morning, I post to College Planning Services, Inc.’s Facebook page links to articles that I feel offer something interesting about higher education and the college and graduate school admission process.  One of today’s links was to the podcast of The Brian Lehrer Show: College Letters.  Today, the day students across the country, and the world, will hear from a small group of highly sort after colleges and universities, Lehrer airs a highly relevant interview with Jacques Steinberg, education writer for the New York Times.   

To my surprise I agree with most everything that Steinberg says.  I agree especially that the admissions process “is not fair.”  Steinberg tells listeners not to put stock into what rejection means because the process can be highly subjective.  As an example, Lehrer plays an excerpt from the recent Tova Smith NPR broadcast Behind the Scenes: How Do You Get Into Amherst. Listeners hear that a student is rejected because the reviewer does not like the first sentence in the student’s essay, which she interpreted as not showing intellectual passion, but rather showing a passion for just music.  This example showcases, according to Steinberg, how admissions officers at the highly selective schools are sometimes “grasping for reasons to say no.”

To all the parents who will be hurting tonight because their children were denied, take a deep breath, swallow your disappointment and move forward. Your child was just one of the unlucky ones. Your child is still the same intelligent, curious and wonderful person he or she was before the denial.  Where a person attends college does not determine success in life.  It is up to your child to determine his or her own success. 

The College Admissions Scoop: Parents Beware - Not All Independent Educational Consultants Work and Think Alike

By Marilyn G.S. Emerson, M.S.W.,  CEP

Recently, one of my colleagues sent me a link to a Radio Times question and answer session with Andrew Ferguson, author of Crazy U: One Dad’s Crash Course In Getting His Kid Into College.  Ferguson shared his thoughts about an independent educational consultant (IEC) he shadowed, and then seems to suggest that all IEC’s practice similarly. I was not surprised, but was definitely dismayed by Ferguson’s inferences about my profession and my colleagues.

Parents engage my services for many reasons -- to take the stress out of the home, to help them navigate higher education options in order to find the group of schools that fit their child both academically and socially, and to provide the adult support for their child that they are not able to provide because of, for example, an illness or an aging parent. They may use my services because their child learns differently and requires special support, or simply because they are naturally interested in their child’s success, or they realize that their child is one of hundreds with whom the school’s guidance counselor is working.  My clients do not hire me to get their child into a particular college or group of schools.

After meeting me, and before signing my contract, parents know that I, like many of my IEC colleagues, do not encourage parents to “professionalize” their children’s childhood.  I do not “market” students, and I do not encourage them to participate in particular activities for the primary purpose of getting into college. I, and most of my colleagues, encourage students to be themselves, to explore possibilities and to discover their real interests.  I believe that every student has strengths and I assist students in finding theirs.

Most of the families IEC's work with are not made up of "high net-worth individuals." I and most of my colleagues charge far more modest fees than those of Ferguson's consultant.  If you are interested in hiring an IEC, I strongly suggest that you and your child meet with the consultant and ask questions before signing on.  It is very important that your family, and especially your child, feel comfortable with the person you hire; otherwise the process will not work.  The Independent Educational Consultants Association (IECA) provides a list of questions designed to help you ask the right questions.

The College Admissions Scoop: Seniors Focus on Your Acceptances

By Marilyn G.S. Emerson, M.S.W., CEP and Jana Jett Loeb

A college admission decision is not a vote on who you are as a person, what you have or have not accomplished, or what you would or would not bring to that school. It is the nature of admissions that when there are more qualified applicants than there are spaces, some very talented individuals will not be accepted. As such, a denial shouldn’t be taken personally or too seriously. It doesn’t change your talent and promise one bit.

If you have made a thoughtful and dynamic list of schools, you will have some excellent choices. April is a month when schools work hard to woo their admitted students, and you should take advantage of opportunities to visit these campuses, meet other admitted students, and speak to current students at these schools. Now the tables are turned, and the decision is up to you. Use this opportunity wisely. You might have to recalibrate some of your initial priorities, but you will have plenty of chances to get to know the schools well and make the right decision for yourself. You have the ability to make your choice the “perfect fit.”

The College Admissions Scoop: Don't Obsess!

By Marilyn G.S. Emerson, M.S.W., CEP

Early this week the print and TV news media ran with the story of a mom who is suing her child’s pre-school for damaging her daughter’s chances of gaining an Ivy League education.  Why are some people are so obsessed with a small group of schools that they don’t want or allow their children a normal childhood?  Who or what factors create an environment where both parents and students think the value of education is in a name and will pursue actions that lead many to question their sanity?  In some instances, this parental obsession gets passed down to their children who also do - dare I say it – stupid things.  Take, for example, the teenagers in a suburb of New York City who allegedly hired others to take the SAT’s for them.  

As an independent educational consultant I visit between 30 and 50 colleges each year, all over the United States, as well as some international schools.  My visits have reinforced what I knew to be true – there are many, many wonderful institutions of higher learning.  These colleges and universities have professors invested in teaching undergraduates, interesting and unique course offerings and spirited campuses. Most importantly, the students who attend these schools are happy to be there because they found the right environment for them to be successful academically and happy socially.  So, instead of obsessing about a few schools, keep an open mind and help your child broaden his or her college search. 

Tips for parents:

·         Don’t believe everything you read or hear about college admissions.

·         Don’t compare your child to your neighbor’s child or any other child.

·         Don’t make your child’s college admission your hobby or your job.

·         You are there for parental support, not parental interference.

The College Admissions Scoop: The Complexity of College Admissions

By Marilyn G.S. Emerson, M.S.W., CEP

Every morning on my business facebook page I post links to articles related to college and graduate school admissions.  This week one of the posts linked to a report from the College Board Advocacy and Policy Center on Parent and Research Perceptions of Complexity in College Admission.  The first phase of their research shows that while students, parents and guidance counselors may complain that the decision process is not transparent, most found the college application process to be fairly easy to understand and only moderately stressful if a student applied to four colleges or less.  The research also showed that the more schools a student applied to the more complex the application process became.  This was particularly true if the schools were private rather than public.

Given the small number of surveys used for the study, what I take away from the research is the need for accurate information that gives parents and students a better understanding of the college admission and college decision process.  

The College Admissions Scoop: Acceptance is Unpredictable

By Marilyn G.S. Emerson, M.S.W., CEP and Jana Jett Loeb

As March gets under way, colleges will come out of hibernation and begin to send out decisions.

If you are admitted, congratulations! You have proved that you have worked incredibly hard, you have shown that you can clearly do the work and that you would be an amazing addition to the school.

If you are not admitted, you have proved that you have worked incredibly hard, you have shown that you can clearly do the work and that you would be an amazing addition to the school.

So wait, why didn’t you get in?

The college admissions process is not random, but it is highly unpredictable. Admissions committees are thoughtful, thorough, and deeply invested in appreciating who you are as an applicant. But from the position of the applicant, it is indeed unpredictable because you can only see what you present to the school. You cannot see the vast pool of applications from which they are choosing, and you cannot know how your unique set of strengths and contributions will fit with their priorities for shaping a class. In 2007, Richard H. Shaw, Dean of Admission and Financial Aid at Stanford University wrote, “ I wish there were a formula to explain who is accepted and who isn't, but the decision-making is as much art as it is science. Each class is a symphony with its own distinct composition and sound; the final roster is an effort to create harmony, and that means that some extraordinary bass players don't get a chair. What's more, even among my staff there are legitimate differences about applicants.”

So, don’t spend time and energy on why you weren’t accepted. Focus instead on all the wonderful choices you have.